Tuesday, October 06, 2009

BACK BACK BACK!!

I see it's a slow week in the Porn News....

Well that will all change soon..

I'm back from Florida with alot of stories to tell...

Basically......Austin Wilde, Ryan Raz, Krist Cummings, Extrabigdicks.com, Johnnies, Club Fort Lauderdale, Club Voodoo, AJ Cross, Fabscout.com, bah bah bah bah bah...

Alot to talk about....Alot of Vids and Pics to share ALOT ALOT ALOT

Photoshoots.......

Performances..


I have alot of stuff to write about.

I want to say right off the bat.........


This Florida trip was probably the BEST TRIP EVER IN MY LIFE!!!!........


But unfortunately, I was struck with an Episode(Bipolar) during the trip.....

*Sigh it came at the worst time..........

I was good Thursday - Sat but with the filming(I filmed 1 scene down there for ExtraBigDicks)and performing 6 Shows(yes that's right Six of them)Working out with Austin..and hanging out with the rest of the Porn stars..... I was mentally tired and emotionally drained from all the events. I saw the signs coming and tried my best to survive through the storm. Sadly I was Wreck on Monday....

And I just wanted to go home and Decompress from all the action.....

When I have an episode....I get quiet and then look for the Exits out of the club or bar...

To the guys, Austin Wilde, Ryan Raz, Rusty, Uri, Krist Cummings, Howard and John I like to say Thanks for putting up with Me.....I can be a HOT MESS sometimes......

When I saw the signs coming(An episode)....I would get up as soon as possible and leave the room...just to go outside and get some Air and clear my head...

So to the guys....if I came off alittle Withdrawn....I'm sorry!!!!

When I have an episode.....I start thinking People are plotting against Me. And then I have the feeling that I'm backed into a corner......so to protect myself, I retreat from the situation....No harsh words to anybody, no fights, I just simply Shut down!!!! I tend to walk away without saying goodbye to anybody and just retreat to a place that is safe.

It was harder to deal with this time...because I was surrounded by Porn stars day and night. Think about having an episode, and there are Newcomers coming up to you Left and Right, asking questions and looking at you as the "Big Star". Press are asking you questions, everybody wants you on Stage!!! And my character Diesel is.......Super confident, smart, witty and In Ur face!!!

So on the outside, I have to have this Air of Confidence........but inside I felt like crying......

To make matters worst.........Austin Wilde....... I hate this Guy!!!

And the reason why I hate this Guy?????

Because HE IS FUCKING AMAZING!!!!....He's young, Super Sexy!! Slamming body!! And he has such a STAND OUT quality to Me....Hence I was Jealous the whole time hanging out with Him.

I tried to play it off like He wasn't getting under My skin....but He was!!! He has the Talent, Looks, Mental state, and He is so Sexy and Intense!!!! He reminds Me of myself when I started out!!! And I can admit it here!!!....... I was Jealous of Him!!! Which only added to my episode.....How can I compete with this Guy!!!

He was Super Nice to Me(the whole time), and all I could do was try to find a weakness in his game plan..... He's Tight!!!! Has great sense of Humor!!! The biggest smile, and all he has ever done was say good things about Me!!!

He's a Great Talent!!! And I have to expose myself and say that out of alot of Porn Star that I have met.......I was kinda of Intimidated to be around him....

There I said it!!!

So if ur reading this Austin!!! Ur one Hell of a Guy and I have much Love for Ya!!! And I highly respect you!!!

I have nothing bad to say at all!!!

Ryan Raz.....what more Can I say about this Hottie that U dont already know????? To Ryan Raz all I could think about saying to him was: Skittles, Unicorns, and Kittens he is such a cutie!!

Howard from Fabscout.com.........You are one of my good friends in this business. I have learned alot from you... U have always had my back..... And U showed Me the best time in Florida, U opened Ur house to Me, talked with Me about the business, and gave Me some of the Best Advice that I use to this day.... Words can't express the amount of respect that I have for ya.........What U bring to this Industry...And the message that U try to teach ur models. Ur stance on the bareback issue is right point and I hope more continued success.

Gio from GioPhotography.........This Man is simply the Best!!! His eyes behind the camera wheter Still photography or Vid, the Man is showing his skills and I was so impressed with his jump into Directing.......I hate to go on and on about him....but He is simply the Best!!!!

Well I can write good things about everybody on this trip but I need to start writing about the stories and the people...

I just wanted to write this post because I survived the storm...and I'm reflecting on the times out there and I had a blast!!!

More to come People!!!

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