Thursday, January 17, 2008
I WAS ABOUT TO GIVE UP UNTIL..........
I'm going to be really honest with U the Fans...........
Its been tough on me the Last couple of months and I have been under the radar for some time now. Ya Ya Ya I do the events and take the pics and stuff....... but I'm coming to grips that the Porn Industry is not accepting Diesel Washington as another Super Star of Porn(Fuck that!!)(the Levels: People who do Porn, Porn stars, Super Stars of Porn). And I will be stuck as just a Porn star(which is fine with me.....Bullshit) people still ask me to this day, Why I do Porn? Cause I like it!! And I get to show off!!.....
Under this cool surface, I deal with my own problems of Survival, Racism, Education, just daily living. the constant pressure of being a Representative of the African American in movies, cause lets be real.... There are not many of Us in this business but yet:
I receive emails daily, saying I'm a sell out, Uncle Tom, that I'm one of these so called Actors who turned his back on his own community. I only date white men bah bah.... all rumors and bullshit!!!! Now this is coming from my "Own" community no less. From the White guys, its the usual Nigger remarks, Not good enough to fuck that or This guy in a scene. Black gorilla bah bah bah......etc etc More crap. Not to mention, it seems nobody wants a relationship with Porn Star(I cant blame them)for all types of reasons(getting personal in my blog I know but fuck it!!).
Not to mention, I'm basically the "Only" African American at these events, and standing at 6'6 245lbs I stand out everywhere I go......
But I'm ready for that, usually people leave saying "Ur so much different from what I expected..... and that's a good thing!!" I have always said Diesel is a character I play people!!! My legal name is not Diesel Washington, Nor do I always have to be rough in the bedroom. No I'm not gay for pay, I do private shows so that means I'm Pay for Play(theres a difference)I came into Industry just like I wanted to, Big, Mean, Scary, and Aggressive. I based my character Diesel, off so many influences growing up comic books, TV, and other Porn stars(gay and straight). I told ya what Porn Idols were mine growing up, so I took a piece of this performer and that one and that one and made it my own. I wanted my blog to reflect that character, but to be honest I didn't expect that People would take me so seriously...... I have said I live my life in dual roles of people, Porn star Diesel, My Friends use my Nickname, and my Mother uses my nickname, unless she is mad at me then its my Full name LOL. I still feel like a kid at heart, but wrapped in a Mans body.
At this point on my journey I feel I need to change the image of Diesel. Call it reinventing Diesel, I'm learning to smile more and just enjoy the attention rather than shut myself away from it. I have said that before, but I'm working much harder at it. I went in with a game plan starting off Diesel right and it worked.......... but it worked too well!!! I started to believe I was that character!!!! Caused alot of problems for me 2007. Being that Mean Aggressive Top works and I can make a good living from it. But to move to that next level, I have to win over people in the Industry, by getting good reviews, talk to other models(networking so they are not scared to work with me) do more photo shoots, more exposure etc etc. Case in Point:
On a Performers Level, I talk to other Models who have issues with doing scenes with African Americans(Ur Decision). Some say its a Diesel Washington issue.....??. They always say they would sleep with me, but it has to be off camera(Tons of Porn Tops big ole bottoms, but would never bottom onscreen) or even worse.......
I'm at hustlaball right?? I'm dancing around having a Blast on the dance floor and this little blond haired boy taps me on shoulder and asks me "Are Ya Diesel" I said ya Whats up? the story I got from him was that Titan asked this model to do a scene with me and he turned down the scene, HM maybe because Diesel is 6'6 245lbs 10inch dick, fucks like a bull, and is mean as shit(on screen)and says in his blog that he loves to fuck!!! I have to admit it, I'm alot to handle and I give 110 percent when it comes to my scenes(that's why the Scene is intense)just the way I do it I guess. I always say u be the best bottom u can be cause I'm going to be the Best top I can be. But to Aaron James(porn model,Google him) Defense, he said he bottomed(Versatile) before but doubted he could handle me(only saw pics and footage of me) at the time.......but after having a chance to talk and hangout with me, Now says he could kick himself in the ass for passing up the opportunity to work together in the past. Too Bad for me from squeezing his ass(many times LOL)he got a Bubble butt to die for. Oh well ....Congrats on being named a Jet Set exclusive good for ya!!! Ur a cute one!!!
To me going to these events, is helping to take down these bullshit color concerns. I know I'm doing the right thing when I hear people say "I was never into Black guys before but u changed my thinking" Or even better, this one from
Riley Burke(porn model)" U know I was never into Negroes but I would let ya shove Ur dick in my ass"..... Now I could take the statement ugly......but hes 21(was drunk at the time) and I know what he means to say..... it was a compliment of sorts. Just little things like this help to change thinking patterns. Think about it, a 21yr kid who uses the word Negro(that is ole fashion term like Colored)where would he get it from? Somebody older than him, probably from all white community, and he is just repeating terms he heard growing up......ding ding. So instead of drama, I thanked him for compliment and corrected him to use a more updated PC version of the word such as African American or just say Black, kissed him and smacked him back on the ass sent him on his way.
Dealing with Lack of Press this year, Lack of Work(for reasons above)it was a tough year for me. Added that I busted my ass in performances on screen and lack of nominations drives me nuts. FEAR was a mega hit, yet it wasn't reviewed.....Let me tell ya!!
In FEAR(if u don't know)I do an amazing water sports scene in which I'm standing behind Francois Sagat(who is tied up) and piss over him, but the piss lands right onto top of his head(takes skills, u guys need to see the scene)Also I monster fuck Sagat and lick my own cum from his skull tat(a must see) yet wasn't nominated for anything. I then read the reviews of Breakers my scene was reviewed well, but very downplayed on my actions in the scene. To put it bluntly I piss over a Toyota Forerunner(yes that is correct)no mention of it at all in review. My body was perfection, no mention of it, a great fucking sequence with Victor Banda trimmed down to 3 lines about the scene. I was/am upset at that, so u can say I'm venting big time now.
What more can I do???? I'm already working twice as hard as everybody, so I'm just bummed out. And then it hit me............. Denzel Washington was in movie after
movie and never won an Oscar until he played a Bad guy on screen. Which means to me that I have to go against the character I created. Diesel is massive, take charge and bossy. No I wont be bottoming(like That is ever going to happen!!)but I need to go from the Bad guy to good guy.
Enter good news now:
Release date of my next movie is coming up Like I said I work hard on my movies and this is no different. My newest movie I have two scenes in one movie, my first scene was awesome and I really bring a new style of fucking to the table(a must see) my final scene I will say this DOUBLE FISTIN AND DOUBLE FOOTING while pissing at the same time(picture it). If this movie doesn't push me ahead of the pack, I wont say it...........
I start filming next month on my next film, and listen to this, My partners, one White guy and my other Partner is Black!!!!! So this should stop the rumors and hear say. And to my "Own" community u better support this film it will star Diesel Washington in his most shocking scene ever!!! Working on the screen treatment right now as we speak.
So to end this blog right 2008 is my year!!!! From the looks of this years Award show 2007 was the Year of Twink. I saw the trend happening, Porn is shifting its direction toward a younger crowd, even the consumers are younger nowadays, and its in fashion to be a Porn star, regardless of if u have skill or talent. Just like in Straight porn long gone are the days of Big Fake Tits on the female performers, people want natural tits and girl next door looks now. Just like gay porn,the shift went from Steroid hunks moving it, to Boy next Door with the Jock body looks, to even just little boys barely over 21 looking to make a name for themselves. Some granted are good performers............ the rest were working for another check and are cute. Flatout
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