I think its really over.....
While out in Chi town I received several texts from "Petey" very mean spirited and nasty(I deserve it)all week I have done nothing but say I was sorry. Over and over I would get back mean and nasty texts...
I know I set up myself for failure, I get it but I can't withstand the meanness being thrown my way constantly. I have to keep working and maintain myself in business/porn industry without having to deal with the emotions of a person scorned. He has the right to be Mad and upset and I can handle anything that he throws at me.
But he took it to another level that I can't handle....
I could deal with him cheating on Me(small change) I can deal with the mean comments and lashing out at Me. He could sleep with my Best Friend and I would be still cool with that. But he took it to that level where I want to kill him(not really Kill).
I know people get angry and stuff...
But to destroy my PlayStation and burn some of my Comics and tear up my clothes???
That is some "Waiting to Exhale" shit!!! :
The part that pisses Me off about all of that, "Petey" is well off and his family is doing very well with themselves. So to destroy something of mine, THAT I WORKED HARD FOR really put Me in a nasty mood. Secondly I was getting text after text of mean shit sent to Me every hour.
I wear my emotions on my sleeve, at events I have to be Diesel Washington. The Diesel Washington who is sad and upset, most people do not like and that is not fair to my fans who want to see Me. If I'm just standing around feeling sorry for myself, nobody wants to be around that.
I received alot of emails from Fans who read my Twitter and ask Me "Now all of the sudden your out slutting again, why am I not fighting for "Petey"????"
I can not force someone to be with Me, I think at this point We both need some time apart(gives Us both time to think)and that is the situation right now.
So there you have it!! I still Love "Petey" but I can not force him to take Me back. The situation has changed and I don't think he will ever be able to trust Me again, in the time I got to know "Petey" he carries baggage with him everywhere and the Man never forgets.
So he is one hard cookie to crack........
Not to use an excuse or anything, but I have a tour coming up soon and I will be traveling the United States so maybe this is best for both of us.
This is not the end of the story, so We will see what happens down the road.
Wish me luck!!