Yeah so things are shakey...
"Petey" and I are on speaking terms now and even cracked a few jokes with each other. I will take that right about now, I know I fucked up and I'm seeing the future of how to handle myself correctly...
This is just a set back and that is all, I will fight to get back "Petey" so only time will tell.
What have I learned from this??
Like I said before I do not lie, and the first time I decided to lie to the person I loved it cost me big time. Lesson learned!!! When I came into the relationship with my heart on my sleeve it was like magic. I spoke from the heart and kept open communication with "Petey" the minute I slipped and broke my rule of not lieing bad things happened and they happened for a reason because I put out negative energy instead of good energy.
It sounds alittle sappy but I believe in the whole Good and Bad energy thing. If you keep putting out good energy, people will be attracted to you because Good energy is sexy and enticing. Bad energy nobody wants to be around and insightful can pick up on people who bring negative energy into a situation.
So I learned that I control my path and future(I always knew that forget it recently) the ground work I lay down molds my future and the people around Me. I'm a natural leader and people follow my lead all the time. If my head is not right how can I expect people to follow Me if I have no confidence in myself. In order to stay "Real" I have to admit my mistakes, correct them and move on.
This thing with "Petey" is far from over, We both texted each other despite having a falling out. So something is there, I have to be the one that gets his head right and gets back into the fight to reclaim "Petey" back.
As everything goes in life, the harder you work the more rewards you will see in the end. Sure the timing was not right this time around, but who says I have to give up. I told "Petey" that I will never give up trying to fix the situation he laughs and goes "OMG" well see...
That is good enough for Me..
Oddly enough "Petey" gave Me his blessing for this weekend and told Me to have a good time. His exact words???
"Have a safe flight out to chicago and have some good ole diesel fun out there too, I've had u wound up lately, relax"
This relationship was built by two people.....
Did anybody notice I didn't talk about the "Issues" "Petey" had, or that I didnt try to place blame on "Petey"??? Not going to play the Victim this time around. I was the one in charge of this relationship, if I can't set the good example for him to follow, then I do not deserve for anybody to follow Me.
In some ways I played a hypocrite, I should have practiced what I preached(No lieing)the minute I strayed away from setting the example it came back to bite me in the ass.
First step was reconnecting with "Petey" and clearing the air
Second step rebuild friendship
Third step Earn back his trust
Final step start over on the right path, only this time resist the evils of Hot ass, on random strangers..
Which is hard, it was like I was fishing, and the fish jumped in the boat, scaled itself, dipped itself in butter, jumped in frying pan and put a sign on itself saying eat Me.
This time around I will learn to respect myself and live the life I want to lead. Its not hard because I choose my own path and direction I want in life. Nobody controls Me and I'm a big boy who can make decisions for myself.
Back on the right path again...
It took my brother Roy Jones, to enlighten me again about having Knowledge of Self. I'm a smart dude and I know alot of things, I let myself down this time around, but I'm only human. I'm not going to repeat this cycle again, I should have known better.
Now I know and I will march forward again, you can not stop forward motion of a fighter. You can only get out of the way because I'm coming through.
Anyway heading to Chi town and not carrying any negative energy with Me, I'm only putting out Good energy this time around and watch how many people will follow Me knowing that I control my own future...