Going to hangout this weekend, I think I will take some pictures for the fans. Sometimes I forget its a difficult balancing act between being a Porn Star and a Blogger.
I gave you Porn Star for the last couple of weeks, I would put up a Vid shirtless and leave that for the Fans. I guess some people took offense to that and wanted Me to go to back to blogging.For five years, I have been writing this blog and sometimes I think I covered everything that I needed to cover.
I read over some past posts and it seems that I'm repeating myself in some posts. Constant readers probably get upset that I repeat myself sometimes, but you guys have to remember I get new readership every single day. I have five years worth of material to go through.... FIVE YEARS!!!
I can't expect new readers to go back to past posts(They should)anyway.........
I'm bringing my camera today, and I think its time to start taking pictures in the city trying to be hot!!
You people have no idea how goofy I am, even though I'm alittle rough around the edges. I'm alittle socially awkward, I have said it before and becoming a somewhat popular star has added to that awkwardness.
When I'm on!! I'm cocky, confident, loud and some what outspoken. When the pressure and the lights are on!! Diesel is in his best form!!! Off camera the "Editor" is alittle goofy, scatter brained over thinker(does that make sense?)I tend to get lost in thought and when approached by people I seem alittle "Annoyed". There is a reason for that....
I have been in overkill with the Porn and escorting, I have groomed myself into believing that anybody that wants to "Connect"(Nonsexual)with Me has to have some hidden agenda. Yeah that is paranoid thinking, and it sucks!!! I hate to think like that, but I noticed it becoming more and more of a problem.
So I took charge of my life, if I want intimacy and that feeling of sharing something with someone, I have to set barriers for myself. I went on a date last week, We did the movies and then dinner and then went out for drinks. At the end of the night, instead of grabbing up the "Victim" and fucking the hell outta them. I gave them a passionate kiss and walked them to the train station and sent them home.
I felt so different and proud of myself, I didn't have to be this sexual animal and Bed every person that I meet. There was a period in time that I would do the "Booty Date" which is different from doing a "Booty Call"
A "Booty" date is when you take out the person and do the whole Dinner/Movies and then fuck afterwards. I was the King of that!!! I just liked spending time with people and not having to rush into bed. I didn't want to do the Lets meet up and fuck and then We go our separate ways thing.
I know it sounds funny, I was being to think I was "Dick on Demand" and just a piece of meat. Bad way of thinking....
Anyway I'm enjoying life and trying to be more social, if you see me out. Be warned I might growl at you when you first talk to Me. Give Me some time and then I will warm up to you... As long as you don't say "I jerk off to your movies all the time"
Then We good!!