Lets start:
America's Next Black Bottom contest(ANBB), ANBB was not as successful as I thought it would be, this was due to "Certain" reasons:
Some applicants even though they had the desire and passion to be the ANBB, they didn't have the right look.. Main factor, a Hot Body.
To be honest, alot of guys were needing alittle more time in the gym. I can work with potential, but its alittle harder with models who are 15lbs or more overweight. I don't want to sound harsh, Yes you have the Heart, Desire, Passion... You just have to hit the gym harder... Please understand I say this being humble. I sent my pics to Titan on the first time around and I was denied. Second time around, I came Top form and Bam!!! I was signed!! Just saying...
The Right Ink
Companies are cracking down on the type of Ink a model has, These Jailhouse Tatts, don't work!! Tatts on faces, necks, back pieces(that are huge)Stomach Tatts. Hard to find work for because this is Mainstream and its broadcasted to a Larger Audience some of which might find the Tatts not as appealing... Blunt but true!!
The Hair
Dreds, Cornrows, Fancy Designs!! The only way I can explain it, its like going to a Job interview!!I used to have Dreds, so I know from first hand knowledge, that my hairstyle might not appeal to certain people. Porn works the same way, I'm trying to give you a perspective that U can understand.
My Dreds:
Stigmas
We covered this in another post, and it came to light. Here is an email I got from a Fan:
Methinks, to bottom for someone who is not of the same race is a very brave, rebellious and revolutionary act, and many brothers aren't quite yet ready for that kind of revolution.
Why? Because to do so challenges and defies all that may be politically, socially and historically ingrained in black men (whether or not they choose to venture into in porn). The idea of bottoming for a white man taps into a mindset that stems from slavery when 'the man' took our basic freedoms and did his best to FUCK us, spiritually, and metaphorically.
As such, to this day, I personally know brothers who will date white men, even exclusively, but will ALWAYS insist upon topping them.
If this philosophy does indeed stem from that whole massa/slave mentality, then, in essence, it messes with one's own personal idea of manhood... and it also defies/challenges what it means to be a strong BLACK man in America.
I'm not saying it's wrong or right. I'm only stating what could be, and indeed seems to be the prevailing mindset, especially amongst gay men with aggressively political/ sociological ghosts floating around in their psyches.
*ponder*
One.
I'm not going to rant about this, I covered this in a post already. I understand that Stigma. And its Big!!
So bottom line I need to go back to the drawing board and plan another form of Attack. I don't feel bad...The timing is not right!! I will still help Black models into in this Industry, I just have to get all the pieces in place.
Another story about the ANBB, I had one model that had the look, and body and was hungry to dive in. We talked online a few times and the model mentioned reading Bobby Blakes book. Here(Ur Welcome Bobby)
After reading MY LIFE IN PORN the model quickly got cold feet!! But Who am I to judge??? I'm under constant drama!! Constant!! Some say it follows Me!! All I ever try to do is be myself!! Diesel Washington is a Porn character!! The model behind that "Character" is complex, has his issues, but for the most part just wants people to be honest with him. It takes a Very Strong person to be able to handle all the Neg things that this business has to offer(I will save that for another post)
MOVING ON..... YOU PEOPLE WANT TO HEAR ABOUT THE FORT LAUDERDALE TRIP!!! HERE GOES!!!
The ANBB contest kinda of bothered Me, but I turned my attention to my scenes with Suite 703. The Suite 703 shoot with Scott Alexander was such a success!! And I want to Thank Suite 703 for giving Me the Opportunity to enlighten its audience. A Huge ShoutOut to the Supporters and the Fans that went out and downloaded the scene. I said it before, We show what We got in our pockets, and the Industry will cater to it. Anyway...
I was ready for the scenes I worked out hard and my body was ready!! I was mentally ready and prepared!! These scenes were important to Me!! I will explain later...
Leading up to these scenes was like a Soap Opera, at first I was going to be partnered with Derek Reynolds. I will be blunt when I say this.... He dropped out because He is getting braces.. So bad timing.. And before I get the emails I know Derek Reynolds has a "History" doing "Other" work. But the Man is getting his smile worked on. LOL
We were going down the list of performers and was having No Luck!! Lets put it on table, the problems that is LOL:
Some models were HIV poz and couldn't apply(Suite 703 requires its models to be tested, Yes!! Thank God!!)
Some models were not inshape enough!!
Some simply couldn't handle the Dick(that's what they said)
And lets face facts, there are NO BLACK BOTTOMS IN MAINSTREAM PORN! Plenty of Black bottoms in Thug Porn, I understand this......
I reached out to some models from the "Thug" side and responses were 1. They didn't want to sell out by going Mainstream. Sell out?? You got to be kidding?? 2. They only wanted to work with Black companies 3. They were Versatile and afraid if they bottomed in Mainstream they would only be viewed as a bottom. What???
I mean just hearing these bullshit excuses nearly drove Me mad. 1. If your that ignorant to think by going to mainstream your Selling Out!! That ignorance right there turns Me off Big Time!! Your a fucking model, and this scene could have been a breakout role for you..Geez!! And plus the opportunity to get more jobs, more jobs more money! 2. You only want to work for Black companies??? News flash!! Most of these "Thug" sites are owned by White Men and if you don't know that.... Then you are kinda of stupid!!
So you get your checks and cash them but don't look up the company that holds the check??Okay... Never met the President of the Company?? No? Ever wonder who is that Older White guy that works in the Office?? Never crossed your mind?? They sit in the Big Chair in the Big Office Hmmm??? 3. Your Versatile and don't want to be viewed as a bottom....
What the Fuck??? Your a Versatile performer so that means you bottom correct??? I think that means depending on the role, you can either Top or Bottom right??? I would think you would use that as a Benefit!! You take a Huge Dick and Hard pounding!! Then your next role u come out as a Top and slam fuck the bottom that your working with and have Fans saying "Damn!!! He took One Hell of a Pounding from Diesel, and then gave a pounding to another model. He takes it and Gives it!!" Do I have to preach to the Choir?? Its simple people!!
Now I'm down to Earth, if someone said they didn't want to work with Me just because they didn't want to work with Me. I can understand that. Its simple, fast and to the point, I could move onto something else instead of hearing some lame excuses
Fast Forward
We finally get the Match Ups Jace Jones, Redmond Fox, all the flights are confirmed and booked and everybody is on the same page. I'm excited to work with both, and its an added plus that I help two Newbies to the business. People say I'm this and that but I do know the situation in Gay porn and We need more Black models. Anything I could do to help these models I was willing to do. This was important for Me and for what I'm trying to accomplish.
I get to Fort Lauderdale and I'm ready!!!
First Bad news, Redmond Fox backs out!!!Accommodations were already made, the flight was already booked and paid for. Redmond waits two days before flight to cancel, I'm shocked!! I arrived to Fort Lauderdale on Wednesday, Our scene was Saturday. So I had to hear the news the day before my scene on Thursday. Now the drama starts, Why say your game for the role and then waste peoples time and money by backing out?? That is so unprofessional, and having to find out the night before my scene was just fucked up.
The Reason???
He didn't think it would be good for his Career to bottom for now! Argh!! Then why say you will do it only to back out after everything has been paid for??? I don't want to Bad mouth my Black models but YOU FUCKED UP!! YOU DON'T DO THINGS LIKE THAT!! PEOPLE GET BLACKLIST(excuse pun)FOR THAT!! *SIGH
Luckily, Jace Jones was there and he's a good kid!! I want to put Jace into my Model Development program. He needs to "Tighten Up" his body more but hes Solid, Beefy with a great smile and he oozes sex appeal. Our scene was good!!
I heard the Talk, people are saying I'm a "One Trick Pony". I'm not a bottom you all know this. To show that I'm a performer I decided to become alittle more "Open Minded".
SO FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER!!! DIESEL WASHINGTON GETS RIMMED IN THIS SCENE!!
So there you have it!! My Riming Cherry has been popped!! And as you can see in the Vid, Jace has this swagger!! He's a cool Dude!! Our scene was good and We got it done. Trying to get a scene done and wondering if I will have a scene partner for Saturday was hard(I tend to over think)nevertheless I'm Pro and I got it done.
Since Redmond was a no go, We needed to find another model at last moment. Howard went through all his resources, We had to use an "Another" agent who said they had a model We could use.
Day of shoot, model walks in and We have some small talk. I'm a good judge of people and something didn't sit right. I put alittle distance between the model and myself and let the model fill out the paperwork needed for the scene. First warning sign, he was asked for two pieces of ID(Standard)after some time, he was able to come up with proper ID. Second warning sign, He was asked to bring a copy of his HIV test results, He didn't bring a copy but said he had one in his email. The copy in the email was not dated, signed by Doctor, or had any address on, it looked alittle sketchy. Time was against Us, the location was rented for a certain amount of time. And the decision was made, just send the model to a test site(nearby) for a rapid HIV test. While all of that was happening I headed over to the location and got ready for the scene. I'm waiting for my scene partner(In my Head I know what is going to happen)and Howard comes walking through the door. He says the shoot is a NO GO!!
Now explaining this is a Touchy subject, Howard looks at Me and says "The model can't shoot with you" He said it Directly and to the Point. I think legally you can't disclose someones HIV status without their consent. The policy of Suite 703 is that all models have to be tested, or you will not be allowed on set. Since the model was not allowed to work, there had to be something wrong with his test results. I can only assume the model was HIV Poz, and he tried to hide the fact by using fake Test results(that is why the Test results in his email were sketchy)so I'm blown away at this point.
All these thoughts were running through my head, "a HIV Poz model tried to use fake Test results to work" "My safety was put at risk by some model who wanted a pay check" "Did the model purposely try to Fake US out??" "Why am I putting myself at risk just to film a porno?" "Whose fault is it?" "Did the Model tell his agent he had results and the agent had no clue" "Did the Agent try to Play a Fast one?" All these unanswered questions.....
Even now I'm left confused at the situation, I had to take some time to think about everything and sort everything out....
Do I blame the "Outside" agent for ordeal??? Maybe I should call out the "Agent" that model belonged to.... Maybe call out the model that tried to bullshit Me and put my safety at risk!! I'm so Mad!! I really don't know Who to blame??? I'm trying to put the situation out of my head, but I can't.
I didn't want to write this post at first, I wanted to block everything out of mind and just move on. But then I started thinking, this happens all the time!! HIV neg models have no rights in this business.
You know the military has its Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy. Gay porn has changed alot and its adopting the same policy. There is this policy of DADT when it comes to a models HIV status. Some Studios/Sites do not test their models because its a Condom only company. So HIV neg models might be casted with models that are HIV Poz because the studio doesn't test and since they are using condoms that is deemed safe enough. I will talk about this in depth in another post.
So there you have it!!
I'm alittle pissed!!! I finally get to a position where I can help other models into business and nothing goes right!! I can't tell you how mentally draining it is to go through drama after drama. But...
This time around, my safety was put at risk!! All for what??? A Scene?? I know that doesn't sound right and I want to look past things and keep fighting to make changes. I'm just losing the will to fight is all!! What happened over the weekend really shock Me up.
I sat on set thinking "Wow the business is getting dangerous now" "People are faking HIV tests just to work" That is so scary to think about.
What have I learned??
I did not want to write this post, I didn't want to bad mouth a Model looking to get into the business. But you fucked up Redmond!! I know your New to the game but models don't do what you did!! People talk in this business, and nobody wants to hire someone that ditches out on a shoot. You cost the sponsor, plane ticket money, accommodations, and with the last minute canceling you didn't give Us a big enough window to find a replacement. That is a Big NO NO!!
The ANBB contest that was an eye opening experience to Me, understanding the problem that my "Own Community" faces trying to break stereotypes is a larger problem that will take some time to fix.
HIV testing in Gay Porn its a complicated subject, I will talk about that in another post.
So I'm trying to fight and the chips are stacked against Me!! When will I get help?? I can't do this alone!! I'm losing faith....
12 comments:
Very sorry to hear about your problems in Ft Lauderdale and with Remond letting you down so bad.
Now really is the time for you to do a scene with Marc Williams, as he definitely has one of the best Gym trained hot bodies in the business. i.e competition standard and he has an accomplished record of acting very professonal, as well as apparently being totally reliable.
Plus Marc is versatile, with no hint of the sissy, he's all man.
If any hot hard bubble butt in the business has your name on it, its Marc's ! Do please go ahead and give Marc a try it would be a sensational scene - and with no Dramas.
did you enjoy getting rimmed? bet it felt good!!!
Hi T...well 1st off its about time for the rim of yourself on film..and going off twice!!....sad to read about the apparent risky HIV status of the other actor....reinforces the requirement to wear condoms in my view....
The bottom contest was interesting to read about.... how strongly some peoples anti-racial views are held...sad it is still a barrier for some...even though I believe they are entitled to hold their own opinions etc.. it was your call on the "look" and fitness etc but I am ok with that extra 15lbs....Rgds. Take care Mate....Laurie
It sounds like Studio 703's policies re: using only HIV negative models worked. The model didn't have the right paperwork, they sent him to get tested and there was a problem. Period.
On the other hand, it sounds like you had a great shoot with Jace. I envy him - he got to munch on your booty and he got two loads out of you. Sounds like Mr. Jace has it going on!! He's sexy as hell I think!
please spread the safe sex word.
take care.
do well
your admirer
param
Redmond Fox seems a big Jerk, all attitude and no substance.
Its great that you are shinning the light on HIV status in the industry.Also it really blows that all of those dudes flaked out on the scenes with you. I can't wait to see the scene with you and Jase jones..just hearing you getting rimmed makesmy dick hard, lol. Let us know when it drops .
So ... when do i get to start that program there Diesel? (lol) How you doing any way? Hit me back jaceofomaha@yahoo.com. Had fun lets do it again!
-Jace Jones
Interesting post. I'm glad that the HIV+ model did not get away with not disclosing his HIV status. But, the good news is the screening that Suite 703 uses works.
I'm confused by your reaction to people that don't want to bottom or are hesitant to bottom. You don't bottom. What's the difference?
You often site a stigma about black guys not bottoming for white guys. I think that you are perpetuating a steroetype. Michael Lucas, Tim Tales, Cock Sure Men all film several scenes with blacks who bottom. Eddie Diaz, Matthew Rush, Jason Tiya, Ace Rockwood all bottom. It sounds like people are just selective who they work with. If models don't want to work with a certain performer, manager or studio...isn't that their choice?
Mmm can't wait to see that video...
BTW when it's gonna be online to watch? and where? LOL
And I'm glad that u talk about HIV status and stuff. Specially young ppl now - they just ignore the fact that HIV and all the STD's it's not just a myth or a word... that it can be very serious. So thx for that.
While I'm a "live and let live" type of guy, but I do feel some black models on not wanting to bottom for white guys as it's a total turn-off for me, personally. Now here's the hypocritical part, I do much more prefer and enjoy white guys who bottom for/to black men. Yeah, HYPOCRITE!! I'll take that, 'cause it's just something about watching/seeing a strong, masculine, built, black man burying his dick in some white boy's ass and mouth that gets me all hot and revved up for action!! Not so much the other way around. Yeah, HYPOCRITE!!
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