HMMMM..???? Stop watching me!!! Well if People didn't watch Me I wouldn't be working.... but don't Ya ever get tired of standing Out!!!!?????
Okay I know that sounds funny.... Most People want to stand out in a crowd... Myself??? It's getting kinda of Old and there is nothing I can do about it....
I mean, when I was sixteen years old I was Very Very Tall... and I was still trying to grow into My body!! Which is not easy when Ur Skinny and Lanky with Big Feet!! I stood out everywhere I went and I was not a Pretty sight at 16yr. I had Acne, a Bad Hair cut(didn't we all?) and I just felt strange in my body.
It probably still makes no sense to ya.... Picture coming out of the house...Dressed down Big Time!!(Like the Old clothes U paint in)and coming out of the house, just to run to the store, real fast.... Its like I'm a walking Bill board for the Bummy People!!! Since I'm 6'6(which some people seem to forget)Its hard, not to stand out in a Room or crowd anywhere....But I'm very Low maintenance anyway.... I have to make sure when I leave the House I have to have something put together(meaning outfit). I'm suppose to be this famous Porn Star...and I have to dress the part right???? Yuck!! sometimes I hate that shit!!! Ur always suppose to be all Hip and shit!!!
I wear, what feels comfortable!!! Although I do like my comic book t-shirts, it reminds me of a simpler time.... When I had no cares or worries and just sit on the floor reading comics...Sigh***
Anyway I'm getting off subject!!! Being Watched....Most People would think since U do porn U must be an Exhibitionist..... Not me!!!
Strange as it sounds, I don't like being watched when having sex.... It works when I do Porn, because the Sex isn't real.... Yeah Ur dick is going in them..But Ur worrying about, How Ur body looks??, Are ya Open to Camera?, Does the camera have room for the underneath shot??, Keeping Up the energy, Controllilng Ur Fuck Faces, alot of things are going on in ur head at the same time Ur pounding Ass.....
I like to just be relaxed and take my time and when having some fun..... Showing Off takes alot of energy!!! I have played in front of others(i.e Sex Club) People always want to touch ya, or grab Ur ass!! And Grabbing Diesel's Ass is a No No No.. But I know People, that want the whole spotlight, make noise, scream out.... I'm just not one of those guys...
Dont get me wrong...I have performed many shows....But I was being Paid for it!!! Put down some money!!! And I will throw a big show on for ya!!!!! I haven't done Full on Sex on stage yet.... I have done Water sport Shows, Oral, Ass eating, but no fucking!!! Oh well!!!! Who wants to See Me fucking a Bottom right in front of them????....Scratch that. I don't know why I typed that!!! U probably want to see that!!LOL LOL
Anyway... when the offers come for a Full on Sex show I will Tear Open Some Ass!!!
The other Part of being watched... is walking down the street and older white women would either walk to other side of street or Grasp their purse real tight when walking past me....But that has happened to many African Americans!!
I seem to be Big with Tiny children.... Little kids seem to always want to stare at me..All big eyed and I would be the Nice guy and wave to them.....
But I seem to have trouble with the Next classes of People:
I don't know If people are staring because I'm 6'6
I don't know If people are staring because of the Body(Summer time)
I don't know If people are staring because of the Porn thing..
I get confused sometimes, If people are staring at ya or trying to flirt with ya???? I have problems reading signals sometimes.... Woman tend to be more subdued when flirting.. Men are more direct in their approach..
The Couple Factor, I seem to attract couples now...Which is very confusing... Its easy when its Two men or Two women, but its kinda of weird with a Man and Woman.... I don't know if the Man wants to do a threesome... Watch his Girl get fucked by Me....Or all three of Us play?.. Or the woman wants to see Her Man get fucked??? Confusing...... I tend to get that alot when I travel on tour..
Anyway the Last thing I want to talk about is the Haters!!!! They are the ones that watch Ya the most!!! They don't just watch ya...They Study ya!!! They study your body movements, mannerisms, everything.... Looking for something they don't like in ya.... Something to use as a weapon against ya!!!
I watch out my window, Looking for the haters that are watching me......
I took the pictures above in My space.....
It was to show People that I'm guard against the Haters.....They are always looking through Ur window, trying to find anything they can use against ya.... Fucking Haters!!!
FUCK U HATERS!!! I'M WATCHING MY BACK...AND I HAVE PEOPLE NOW WATCHING MY BACK AS WELL.....
2 comments:
Another enjoyable blog entry. I thought the glimps behind the veil of a pornstar was very interesting. At first it sounds strange to hear a pornstar say he isn't an exhibitionist, but I remember Hollywood actors and actresses comment from time to time about not being the characters they play in real life.
Oh, and I do know the feeling of walking or sitting behind a "purse clutcher".
As far as those who stare, you'll just have to learn to read the facial expressions(and trust your instincts). People are far more perceptive than we give ourselves credit for. I'm sure there are different facial expressions for the people who are staring, I'm not sure what they are, but I'm sure they are different. Someone who's looking with the "wow, he's tall" idea on his mind won't have the same look as someone with a "wow, I've him having sex".
As for the couples, communication is the best solution. The only way to know "what they want" is to ask.
Well, I think that is about it. Much more than I was planning to write. However, I thought your entertaining and informative blog deserved more than a brief comment.
Oh lord! Please stop it! If people stopped watching you, you would start complaining how no one is giving you the attention you deserve! LOL You are too funny with your hot mess!
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