Tuesday, December 22, 2009

MY TIME!!!

I will never make anybody happy........

Sure I have the support of alot of Fans, and alot of People support Me.

But when did I become the Responsible Guy???? Throughout my career I was looked at as the responsible guy. When I worked at Titan, I was the guy that everybody could count on. Alot of scenes would have turned out completely different if I wasn't the responsible guy. I was the one that brought intensity to some of the scenes, when guys were just going through the motions. Gave up my body to make the scenes interesting and different....I didn't get paid more money for doing that!!

I took on the weight of the Black Community, by trying to represent a Man of Color that can work in this Industry and can become successful. Then at the same time, People in my own community called Me an Uncle Tom and Sell out!!

I'm the responsible Porn star and Escort that gets checked out once a month(not once every three months)I sit in the Department of Health and Mental, waiting for test results. I get checked for Gonorrhea, Chlamydia, HIV, Syphilis, Hepatitis, Herpes, bah bah. Every month I get stuck in the arm and my blood drawn for tests because that is being responsible. But at the same time, I hear other models scared to go get checked out and some don't get checked at all, they only go when their dick starts dripping or they have a discharge!!

I talk open and honest on my blog, so Fans can understand What Diesel is all about. I offer a glimpse into my life that is honest and real, and its all for free!!! But in return, I get bashed by emails saying I'm dirty and ugly, and people stalk Me. Other blogs and websites just rip Me apart for speaking my mind.

I worked hard in every scene that I was in, trying to bring something new to the table. I created new sexual positions, and just worked my ass off. But younger guys who just show up on set and go through the motions, get more work than Me and is used over and over while turning in lackluster scenes time after time

I created this persona of Diesel Washington being Large and in charge. Cocky confident the No holds barred kinda of Top!! Which became popular. Then times changed and people were put off by the Cocky nature which was only a character!! People identified with the character so strongly, that the model playing Diesel Washington was viewed as an Asshole and Loud mouth when in reality I'm Sweatheart with a Big Heart

I won Performer of the Year, Best Porn star blog, Hottest cut cock, Best Fetish escort and Best Escort website. Then Winning Hard Choice award for Most Passionate Sex scene. But at the same time never finding a relationship that works, and having people who wont date Me because I do porn

The New positions(Bully, Motorcycle, Cannonball)was just to do something different for porn and I thought it was being creative. I had long said that each bottom that I have worked with deserves more credit for the positions then I do because it takes two people to create that illusion. Reading the blogs, people thought I was humiliating the bottoms and trying to be make them look bad. Or show how Bossy I can be.

I'm often misunderstood and People will think what they want of Me. I can't change that.

I don't know all the answers, never claimed to know everything but I know enough. I'm tired of other performers getting a "Pass" because of their age, experience, and knowledge of the business. They are allowed to make mistakes because they are a Newbies and have limited experience. Veterans as myself when We make mistakes, instead of getting a "Pass" we are told "You should have known better!!" Not Fair not fair!!

I didn't ask to be a role model, but all of the sudden, models were asking Me questions about the business. They wanted advice and direction and this business is hard.

When I started to go in another direction, filming behind the scenes and interviews I thought it would be a change of pace for Me. I always wanted to be behind the camera for a change, at first it was cool to interview people. But people started putting two and two together and I was getting emails from models asking when their interviews are going up. And then they wanted Me to start linking their blogs and rentboy profiles to the Vids and at first I was happy to do. I'm getting more requests from Models wanting to be interviewed by Me. Ummm Guys I'm not getting paid for this so ur going to have to wait until I finish editing other Vids.

Where was I going with this blog????

I needed time for myself, I didn't want to be a role model.....

Finally I got a chance to let loose and be that Party guy that can have Fun!!!!

But again it's time to go back to business.

I had to respond to all the people that were emailing Me saying that I need to be responsible. I need to be a role model for other models coming into the game

FUCK THAT!!! so last week was my time to let loose and be a fucking mess instead of the Guy that always has to be pushing and pushing to climb that ladder!!!


SOME SLUT ONCE TOLD ME IN ANGER TO GO GET LOST IN UR HEAD!!!

I did and I'm back

GUESS WHO IS BACK???

6 comments:

James said...

I'm not even going to respond to this.

peace

Lenny said...

for one of the first times when i read what you had to say. you actually sound sane and reasonable. dont lose your sanity over what black people. most are probably jealous of your success and/or would like to see you with more black porn stars in the movies that you make.

keith said...

Damn, man, read today's post, scared the f*** out of me. A lot of us look up to you, man. I know I'd give my right "appendage" to be you. Buck up. Your fans are behind ya.

Anonymous said...

Diesel, I wish you love, luck, health, happiness an all !! In my ideal world I'd turn the dorner and walk right into you and hit it off big time, unfortunately I live across the big old ocean in London........ I always suspected there is more to you than this porno stuff.

Anonymous said...

You're absolutely disillusioned and these fans who follow you that think for a moment you're any type of role model are delusional as well.

You in now way, shape or form have ever been a role model for the Black community. I'm sorry never. You don't work within the HIV/AIDS charitable community, you don't go to minority events that promote community growth or awareness of the effects of HIV or anything else that's socially effecting our community.

If anything you've misaligned yourself from the Black community by stating on many of your online profiles "NO BLACKS." That's okay with me but you sir are no role model within my community.

You've aligned yourself to be a caricature within the porn industry as the BIG DICKED BLACK DUDE. However your dick really isn't that big at all in comparison to your massive ego.

Just to inform you - you're known within the porn community as someone who is willing to do whatever it takes to please white men in the industry even if that means making a fool of yourself on film for all to see.

Mr. Washington sir, I must state that you are not a hot commodity in the Black community not because of the reasons you've stated on your blog, such as you're not the the thug type - blah, blah, blah. The reason you're not is because you're a self loathing man who looks in the mirror and doesn't like what he sees.

No matter Black, white, Asian or other no one is going to be attracted to a man who doesn't like themselves. Look at the video you did of the behind the scenes on your most recent shoot and how Brent Corrigan looks at you as if you're an idiot. It's because the industry sees you as "trophy n**er." They throw you in the films just to say they have one. Moving on and good day.

Anonymous said...

Well, having read that last comment all I can say is there appears to be some "self-loathing" in the writer! And, please, anonymous? Be a man and put your name to your shit, man.