Thursday, November 18, 2010


Yes the title is correct....

I was online today and someone hit me up on my private screenname(no I'm not saying)and they sent me this link

They said they were Pierre Fitch,

Now I have spoken to Pierre before, but not on that screenname.

If people don't know, this business has made me into a Paranoid Fuck! I get hundreds of emails from people not liking me, I get the death threat here and there(said that before)love emails, stalker emails(What you don't know?)

Stalker emails, are those emails I get from fans that have seen me around or walking in NYC. Riding the train, at the movies, shopping, out at dinner bah bah. I get emails from people saying:

Hey sexy, I saw you walking on 23rd st and 6ave, Wow your taller than I thought. Love the white t-shirt you were wearing, Anyway I saw you talking to some guy(He was cute)and I just have to say your Hot Hot!! I wanted to run up to you and tell you how much I love your movies. But I was scared, anyway I followed you to the store hoping to get your attention, but looked like you were in a rush and you jumped into a cab... Anyway just wanted to tell you, Your Hot!!

Innocent sounding email right??? The only thing that bugged me........

it was signed By Anonymous

Now this is where the bipolar thing comes in, one email I wouldn't mind as much, but I get ten of these a day. To be honest it creeps me out!! Makes me feel every time I step out the door, I have to be worried about if people are following me...watching...staring.

I can protect myself, that is not the part I'm worried about. It's just that nervous feeling of being watched. I guess that sounds crazy for a porn star, we are suppose to be exhibitionists, looking for the attention/camera you know what I'm trying to say..

I have always said that I'm not an exhibitionist, I'm a performer. A performer gets that thrill and energy, from the crowd if performing. I get the rush when the camera is on because I know I'm creating art! An exhibitionist loves to be watched, they want people to stare and watch them, on or off stage. When I'm off stage I don't want any attention..

I get plenty, I'm 6'6 235lbs and I stand out like a sour thumb. Everyday I have people(strangers) coming up to me asking "How tall are you?" "You play basketball??" "You play football?, you have the build"

And the stares from little kids, the little kids just stare right at you like your the biggest thing they ever saw, wide eyed holding onto their mothers leg for dear life. Me being the softy, I always look at the kids give them a big smile, wave at them and they give me this big ole smile in return. It's cute and I never want to give kids the impression that I'm this scary giant. I love kids, I'm a big kid myself so I can relate.

Back to the story....

I just think its creepy to get emails like that. Sorry I know its cute to some of you out there, but it comes off kinda of stalkerish.... Added to my paranoia is that I escort(part time)so I get calls all the time from creepy people, now these are not "Clients". Just creepy people that want to hear your voice and jerk off to it. When people are sexually charge, they will go all out without any regards.

The worst is when I get contacted by someone saying they met me, when they never did. They will go through your blog pick an event that I attended and say they met me there, and come up with this bullshit story to get info out of you. One of reasons I had to put extra security on my old AOL account. When they come up with the bullshit story, I ask for pics, so they ask to connect with me(Old school AOL)to send a pic, but instead of a pic they send a Virus.

Yes the assholes are like that....

Anyway I was contacted by Pierre Fitch, I didn't believe it was him. And I told him to go fuck himself!! I asked him when was the last time he saw me(Hustlaball)you know a test. He couldn't remember so I figured it was a faker and told him four times to go fuck himself.

I asked a reliable source who knows Pierre, and indeed it was his screen name

So I guess what I'm trying to say is...

Sorry Pierre.....

I thought you were a faker!!

Anyway there is a link above to Pierre Fitch's documentary, looks like he is getting a reality show. Good job Boss!!

Sorry again, I can admit when I make a mistake so I wanted to send that out to Pierre. And Pierre if you wonder why I didn't believe it was you online. Read above.

Oh and fuck you for not having me on your site, to rip open your ass! Diesel Washington putting the power to Pierre Fitch priceless..

You were going to fly in Tommy Deluca...

But not Diesel Washington.......Shame on you!! LOL Just kidding!!!


Anonymous said...

This is that many of your fans see in you, honesty, sincerity and above all that you are able to apologize when you feel you've made a mistake.
Nothing is more honorable to a person, that he knows to apologize when he makes a mistake and that it highlights what the rest of those who do not get off their ego.
This post shows something important about yourself and your way of thinking ... "humility", you have it, and that is something that surprises, that's something that surprised me, because I read reviews of several stars, not just the porn stars, other areas of show bizz too, and there are few who can deal with the ego and call a little sanity and humility.
You my friend, have that, that very few possess.
Something I did not know about you and I liked, and that you share it in the post, is that you like kids. You know why children, they will return a huge smile when you smile at them?
Simple ,.... they recognize the quality of human being you are, and they do not confuse your physique or your color as intimidating, they recognize you as one of their peers, because they can see, inside you.
Very good postings.

Adrian, from Buenos Aires.

thegayte-keeper said...

I don't blame you for being cautious. Many of your fans don't know how to separate the job from the man.